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Posts Tagged ‘Paradise Island’

  1. Yes Jane, There is a Paradise Island

    August 19, 2011 by The Belated Nerd

     From the letters page of Wonder Woman #125 (1961):

    Dear Wonder Woman:

         I am the president of our Wonder Woman Fan Club and we would like to know if it would be possible to visit Paradise Island during summer vacation.

    Jane Hanis, Oakland, Cal.

    Dear Jane:

         Paradise Island, the secret home of the Amazons, is fictitious. If it weren’t, and were open to the public, it would no longer be a secret, would it?

    Wonder Woman

     

     

    Dear Jane:

    My name is the Belated Nerd and I would first like to apologize for not writing you sooner to correct a lie told to you fifty years ago. Second, I want to assure you that the reply to your letter above was NOT written by Wonder Woman. As I’m sure you are aware, Wonder Woman and the other superheroes you used to read about when you were a kid (and perhaps still do) are kept very busy protecting us from the forces of evil. Because of this they are unable to respond to letters like yours personally. Even though they often write as if they are the heroes themselves, it is the comic book editors who actually write the replies found on “Wonder Woman’s Clubhouse” page and other comic book letter columns. The name of the editor who answered your letter back in 1961 was a guy named Bob Kanigher.

    Jane, Bob Kanigher is wrong! He has been affected by the skepticism that often comes with age. Which is a scary thing for a man who writes and edits comic books. Yes, Jane,  there is a Paradise Island. It exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy.

    Now that we have settled that, I’ll refrain from further plagiarizing Francis P. Church and give you an example of how an editor more sensitive than cranky old Bob might have responded to your letter.

    Dear Jane:

    I spoke to Wonder Woman about your request and she said that as much as she’d like to give you a tour of her homeland, it would simply be too dangerous for a young mortal like yourself. You see, the women who live there are very fond of a sport called “bullets and bracelets”. This means there is almost a constant rain of ricocheting projectiles on Paradise Island. Any visitor lacking Wonder Woman’s bracelet skills would soon be reduced to swiss cheese.  ‘Nuff said.